by Edward Lee
My Therapist Asks Me to Confess Something
One summer afternoon, I see a Japanese beetle clinging to a rosebush, back iridescent as an oil slick. It is eating a leaf, targeting between the veins and leaving it a skeleton—I have always found this beautiful, but I am neither a gardener nor a biologist worrying about their invasion. What would this gleaming beetle look like against the craggy bark of an oak, or the pale bloom of a lotus? Would it stand out the way it might against my suntanned skin? I hold out my hand and the beetle, not knowing any better, advances. It tickles faintly on my hand as it crawls, its legs pricking and catching on each small ridge of my fingers as I tilt my hand back and forth. Sensing motion, it stills, giving me a chance to admire the flame-lick of copper painting its body, the brilliant jade of its thorax and head. It hums; I flick it away with a practiced motion. It buzzes dully against the pavement before regaining its balance and crawling into the grass. Rubbing my fingers together, I stand, wincing as I see the run in my stocking. I stride towards my destination. I am going to be late.
I did not listen
for a crunch under my heel
as I walked away
Gretchen Rockwell is a queer poet who can frequently be found writing about gender, science, space, and unusual connections. Xe is the author of the chapbooks body in motion (perhappened press) and Lexicon of Future Selves (VA Press) and two microchapbooks; xer work has appeared in AGNI, Cotton Xenomorph, Whale Road Review, Palette Poetry, and elsewhere. Find xer at www.gretchenrockwell.com or on Twitter/Instagram at @daft_rockwell.
Edward Lee is an artist and writer from Ireland. His paintings and photography have been exhibited widely, while his poetry, short stories, non-fiction have been published in magazines in Ireland, England and America, including The Stinging Fly, Skylight 47, Acumen and Smiths Knoll. His poetry collections are Playing Poohsticks On Ha’Penny Bridge, The Madness Of Qwerty, A Foetal Heart and Bones Speaking With Hard Tongues. He also makes musical noise under the names Ayahuasca Collective, Orson Carroll, Lego Figures Fighting, and Pale Blond Boy. His blog/website can be found at https://edwardmlee.wordpress.com.