by Lois Bender
Portrait of a Girl-Child
I’ve never been skilled with likeness / paint, pencil,
even charcoal / none are talents of mine / I lie here,
floor level / wealth of media within arms’ reach /
trace the outlines of your almost-perfection / etch them
boldly like the rise / and fall of the monitor display /
/ failing heartbeat / failed attempt /failed me / paint
a pair of rosebud lips / full / like mine /red / iron-wrought
like the blood of your arrival / like the blood of your
departure /probably translucent / like your skin / like
the sack / crudely-formed / that couldn’t contain you /
you had my hair / unruly mane swirling defiantly
about your head / an amniotic crown / fit for royalty /
I named you Hera / queen of the Gods / like your
namesake you fade / with your heartbeat / into myth
/ smudge softness into the rounded parts of you /
anaemic breath blown into each curve / the crests
and peaks of your face / hazy now / like the voices
whispering of / rest / and / blood loss / my mind / my
breasts are confused / I can’t feel you / can’t make
you out anymore / something has happened /I’ve
done something wrong / the picture is fading / the
portrait is marred / just a single tear / single mark
across my abdomen / across the screen / blood /
quiet chaos all about me / now just remains the
silhouette / a concave belly / a flatline /
Elizabeth M. Castillo is a British-Mauritian poet, writer, indie-press promoter. She lives in Paris with her family and two cats, where she writes a variety of different things under a variety of pen names. In her writing Elizabeth explores themes of race & ethnicity, motherhood, womanhood, language, love, loss and grief, and a touch of magical realism. She has words in, or upcoming in Selcouth Station Press, Pollux Journal, Revista Purgante, Bandit Fiction, StreetCake Magazine, Fevers of the Mind Press, Melbourne Culture Corner, Epoch Press, among others. Her bilingual, debut collection Cajoncito: Poems on Love, Loss, y Otras Locurasis out 2021. You can connect with her on Twitter and IG at @EMCWritesPoetry.
Lois Bender, a longtime New Yorker, combines her background in art direction and graphic design with personal expression in drawing, watercolor, photography, and printmaking creating a fresh synthesis of styles. Her art illustration brand GardenSpiritsNY Designs grew out of her Retail Gift Industry experience and her love of nature. Bender’s art practice has explored nature themes in gardens at residencies in France and The Hamptons, NY, as well as at Skowhegan and the Women’s Studio Workshop. With a B.A. from Hunter College, NY and an MFA from Boston University, she teaches art and watercolor techniques and exhibits her work in the Metro NY area. She is an Art Professor at Essex County College in Newark, NJ and has an art studio in Manhattan. She is an urban and garden sketcher who celebrates nature in all its poetic and ephemeral expressions.